Use This Easy Visual to Help Build Rapport

Here’s a shocker that you may have heard from me beforePeople want to help other people that they like!

"Friends :-)" by @BK, Flickr, CC-By-2.0
Do your friends make you feel good? “Friends :-)” by @BK, Flickr, CC-By-2.0

When people like you, they want to help you. They want to spend time with you. They want to do business with you.

So how do you get people to like you? How do you build that rapport? Continue reading “Use This Easy Visual to Help Build Rapport”

10 Things I Learned from The Uplifter:
Stephen R. Moore from Leadership3p.com
(PRL’s First Podcast!)

Stephen R. Moore sat patiently across from me while I fidgeted with my mobile phone. I didn’t know how my first podcast was going to turn out. I was trying to keep my nerves under control, play it cool, and not waste his time.

Stephen is a leadership and sales coach, helping corporate clients in the car industry get better customer satisfaction and results. His cooperative, Leadership3P, pulls in over $600,000 every year.

His time is valuable, to say the least.

We were already off to a rough start. My plan to

Stephen R. Moore, the Uplifter
The Uplifter was an inspiring first podcast. I am eternally grateful!

meet in a quiet library didn’t work out due to a national holiday (A sincere thank you to all of our nation’s military veterans for your service).

I hadn’t made a backup plan. In my scramble to find a new location, I chose what must have been the loudest coffee shop in miles. Continue reading “10 Things I Learned from The Uplifter: Stephen R. Moore from Leadership3p.com (PRL’s First Podcast!)”

How to Win at the Thanksgiving Table

Happy Thanksgiving to all my friends with PRL!

This Thanksgiving you’re certain to find yourself in a conversation about politics.

Trust me! This is a toxic conversation that you do not want to be a part of.

As Dale Carnegie teaches us,

The Only Way to Get the Best of an Argument is to Avoid It!

If you cannot avoid an argument, I encourage you to ask questions of the other people. Listen and ask questions. Work to understand their positions, with your questions leading people to a high ground position where everyone agrees.

  • Yes, these scandals are horrible. No one deserves to be treated like this, don’t you agree?
  • Yes, the President does say some provocative things. Does it help him keep the conversation focused where he wants?

If you’re unable to bring the conversation to a higher level, you risk telling someone they’re wrong.

Never tell someone they’re wrong!

They’ll fall back into a defensive position, justify everything they’ve said, and point the finger back at you to tell you why you’re wrong.

Instead, do your best to paraphrase the words of the other, in a sincere attempt to understand them. Let them talk themselves out for a while. They might want to be heard, might want to be right. You’re not going to change it over the weekend.

And then remind everyone that you’re thankful that you’re all family, that you want to enjoy the weekend together, and that politics could spoil everything so let’s talk about something else.

No one wants to spoil the party. Give them an out from the toxic conversation, and move on.

I recorded a short (5 minute) video discussing these ideas, you can see it here:

Screenshot_20171121_124607

If you think this will be helpful for others that you know, please feel free to share this with your friends and family!

Thanks PRL readers, and enjoy your Thanksgiving Holiday!

—Jeffrey





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Living with Happiness

The Secret calls it Living in Bliss.

Tony Robins calls it Living in a Beautiful State.

Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi calls it the Flow.

Lao Tzu wrote about Tao, the Way of the Universe, in the 4th century BCE.

Whatever name you give it, when you are happy your life is much better. Time disappears. Everything seems easier.

I have the Chinese character of Tao hanging on my wall among the photos that make me happy.
I have the Chinese character of Tao hanging on my wall among the photos that make me happy.

Imagine a pleasant summer morning. The world seems a bit lazier today. You hear the birds singing as you make your way to work. The sunlight warms your head. You hear your favorite song just before you arrive. Your smile is mirrored back to you by a coworker.

You know it’s going to be a great day. Confirmation bias will help to ensure it. Continue reading “Living with Happiness”

God’s Debris by Scott Adams
Book Summary

True, simplicity is not proof of truth. But since we can
never understand true reality, if two models both explain the
same facts, it is more rational to use the simpler one. It is a
matter of convenience.

"God's Debris" by Scott Adams
“God’s Debris” by Scott Adams

Scott Adams’ book God’s Debris introduces us, the reader and first-person narrator, to the world’s smartest person sitting in a rocking chair, Avatar.

You (the narrator) and Avatar hold a wide-ranging conversation about God, religion, science, and probability.

And it’s persuasive.

Join us for a book summary on PRL!

Continue readingGod’s Debris by Scott Adams Book Summary”

Three Types of Liking:
People Liking People (Part 1)

You like cake? I like ice cream, although I’m flexible.

They’re both desserts. They fall under the same utility in classic Economic Theory, meaning they serve the same purpose: dessert!

Cake or Ice Cream? Photo "Sweet Treats" by Tradlands, Flickr, CC-By-2.0
Cake or Ice Cream? Photo “Sweet Treats” by Tradlands, Flickr, CC-By-2.0

Yet we all know that people have different tastes and preferences. Even economists understand that we like different things, which can make economic models complex!

In his book Influence, Robert Cialdini identified liking as one of his six (now seven) principles of persuasion.

If we want to persuade and influence people, it’s important that we’re liked and that we like others. It’s essential.

No one wants to help the jerk.

But in the age of Social Media, what does it mean to “like?”

Continue reading “Three Types of Liking: People Liking People (Part 1)”