In the new Star Wars: The Last Jedi, a film filled with references to the balance of the universe (tao), a character is asked that exact question.
Was this event good luck or bad luck?
She responds, “I don’t know yet.”
The truth is, we don’t know the full chain of consequences that led to that event, or the full chain of consequences that will follow from our reaction to the event. Our frame is too limited.
None of us are in full control of our lives or the options we have to pick among. Free Will is an illusion. You’re stuck with the options you have. We all are.
Therefore, forgive yourself and forgive others. Change your frame to include the possibility that life is bigger than these events. Besides, there wasn’t much choice to be made in that moment.
The best we can hope do is try and create situations ahead of time where we’ll be successful in that moment.
Don’t stock the fridge with junk food if you want to avoid those late night cravings, for example.
Attach a new behavior to an existing habit, like flossing whenever you brush your teeth.
Small changes now, applied over time, lead to big results in the future.
For myself, I’ve been gaining weight over the last 20 years, post high-school. Not a lot by any standard, but it wasn’t healthy weight gain. It was belly fat from drinking and a sedentary lifestyle.
A pound or two per year adds up, am I right?
I decided that wasn’t the best version of who I wanted to be. Knowing I wouldn’t make time to visit a gym, I started small at home. I added a few pushups and squats to my morning shower routine.
I found an existing habit, and gave it a slight twist that took hardly any additional time.
It’s now been a few months of increasing the numbers and adding a few additional exercises, and I’m the most fit I’ve ever been in my life.
Am I ripped? Nope. Am I healthier and stronger and filled with new energy that I’ve not had ever in my life?
What’s one area of your life where you’re frustrated with your direction or you keep repeating the same mistake?
How can you rewrite that script or adapt your behavior to have a different outcome?
The new year is almost upon us. What do you want to improve in your ow life? Share with us, won’t you? I’d love to read your plans and desires in the comments!